Marathon Weekend

So, this is the weekend of the big Boston Hash House Harriers event centered around the actual Boston Marathon, which is tomorrow. So many of my favorite out of town people came in for the event this weekend, and it was great to catch up with them all. Especially my VTers... I miss Burlington.

The hardest thing about this weekend by far was having to have similar conversations with people about what happened between Matt and I. I guess his version is rather simplified: "She was planning a future, I wasn't," which I guess gets the point across, but some of my friends wanted to know a little more including how I was holding up...

interesting question

I don't really know how to address that one, except to say that I am keeping myself busy, and that I don't regret the decision to end things. I am disappointed that Matt could not envision a future for us together, but I don't necessarily fault him that. I just want to feel special, appreciated, and to be a priority in someone's life after 1.5 years. The fact that he couldn't provide that does not make him a bad person, it just makes him not the right person.

Not knowing who the right person may be is a little scary, but also thrilling in a way. Well, let's just wait and see how I feel tomorrow... this process is a very day-by-day kind of thing :)

A Second Job

So, an opportunity arose to take a per diem job at a hospital I interviewed at for internship: Shaughnessey Kaplan. The position is for weekend work and it involves working in acute care and rehab. It also pays $50/ hr... I decided to interview with them to see if it was something I might be interested in doing.

I was wavering on the ride up to Salem 2 weeks ago as to whether or not I would be willing to give up weekend days for the extra pay, but then I realized there was no guarantee that I would even get the job. When I got there, it was barely an interview and more of a tour and an explanation of what my responsibilities would be.

I was excited to be back in a hospital setting, and realized that the experience in acute care would make me even more marketable after my internship with MGH ended. Once he explained that 2 days a month would be sufficient to work there, I thought... why not? It would be a new experience, and (like it or not) I have a more free weekend schedule these days.

I still don't know what I will do full time at the end of internship in August. MGH has not discussed hiring me, and I am toying with the idea of leaving the Boston area... Seattle? Chicago? Denver? I guess I could really go anywhere. A patient of mine who works as a nurse upstairs suggested getting my resume together and out there now for potential jobs out of the area. The thought scares me a bit, as I would be leaving some many close friends, but if I am seriously considering it, I need to start looking at potential employers.

I'll try and keep this updated with my search and job decisions. Funny that I started this 3 years ago to cronical my journey through PT school and I am almost to the end of it. Where did the time go?

New Scarf

new-scarf
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

So, the best thing happened yesterday at work. The cute little Egyptian woman I worked with presented me with a present. One my colleagues actually came to get me and said my patient was looking for me after the session was over. I was worried she had not understood to head back to the waiting room as her understanding of English is limited. As I found her in our usually room, there she was with this scarf wrapped up for me.

She had knit it for me after I had complemented her on one she had worn to a visit a week earlier. It is very soft, and brightly colored so it may have to be my spring scarf.

I was just blown away by the gesture, and even wearing it now makes me smile!

Internship Update

I am currently still at MGH West in Waltham, but the count down has started for my move to the ACC. 4 weeks from today will be my first day at the main campus. I'll have co-treat time with two clinical specialist: one who specializes in spine, the other extremities, have a 15 minute bike ride commute, and a schedule with at least 2 late mornings! I can not wait.

I will definitely miss the group of therapist out in Waltham, the gym next door to work, and my interesting conversations commuting in with Alex or Casey. I guess I am also a little nervous that the main campus will be more challenging, and perhaps I will not succeed there as easily as I did in Waltham. Well, I guess it wasn't that easy... I definitely struggled those first 8 weeks.

I have been told to study up on the shoulder including relevant literature before heading down there, so I guess even after the boards, my studying days are not over!

I do like a challenge, and I guess I have to remember that and just plan to do my best.

Golda Mark

Golda
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

Another couple who introductions I facilitated had a baby girl at the end of February.

Dasha and Zsolt have been a perfect match since she finally agreed to go out with him 4 years ago. He hounded me for a few weeks, and after she saw how refined his apartment was, she was in it for the long haul.

Congrats on the new edition to the Mark household. I have no doubts that Zsolt is also quite smitten with her.

Malena Devlin

Malena
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

Well, Marisa and Julian are now proud parents. It is funny to think that I helped the two of them meet almost 7 years ago when Marisa commented that he was "very cute" at a housewarming party I had.

I now have to say that perhaps Malena is the cutest in the household these days. Congratulations to them!

A Glimpse of Being Single...

I will start off by saying that I have not written in a while, but will post a recap of the events since Oct worth noting later.

Last night was an interesting experience for me. After an ambiguous conversation with Matt on Tuesday of this week, I think I can safely say that I have no idea where our relationship is headed at this point. I find this slightly ironic because just a few days earlier we went on our first weekend trip together without an agenda other than to spend time together and explore a new area. This trip went better than planned, we had a great time, and for the first time in a few months I started thinking about our future together...

Perhaps that precipitated the subsequent thoughts and fear that Matt expressed Tuesday and the decision to take some time apart this weekend to think through things.

So, a friend of mine decided that I needed to go out last night to spend time out of my apartment drinking and dancing with strangers. While the thought was appreciated, I don't think it was necessarily the best choice.

We headed out to join a going away pub crawl for someone he had met once, and I had never met. To make the evening even more bizarre, I didn't show up there with my friend, but with my ex Brian, who happened to send me a message online while I was getting ready and we decided to head down together. It was good to see Brian, to catch up with what he has been up to, but half way through the night he could tell that something was up. You just can't live with someone and not know when they are unhappy or upset. We then talked a bit about our respective relationships, and he shared with me how much he misses his ex Natalie, and how he now wants to move to England to be with her.

This is someone who left FL for college, has barely used his passport except for work, and has been settled in Boston for almost 10 years. But, she means that much to him! While I could not be happier for Brian and truly wish him the best (I would even help him pack), his adoration for Natalie just seemed to magnify the lack of adoration I felt.

And I want to feel adored...

So, here I am at an expensive downtown bar where the DJ is playing music from my high school and college years, and I am surrounded by girls wearing more makeup and less clothing than me that appear to not know any of the words to the songs being played: ah, yes, they were too young to know these songs as the average age here must be 23. I watch the 23 year olds awkwardly trying to talk or dance with one another, all trying to be noticed and hoping to meet someone tonight.

I dance like no one is watching with my male friends, who are thankfully older than I am, hoping I am not being noticed. I don't want any of these guys to ask for my number or to express any interest in me.

This is not my scene. What am I doing at a 23 year old pick-up bar? Please tell me that this is NOT in my potential future as a single girl in Boston. The whole idea makes my stomach turn.

A Changing of the Guards

Or, more appropriately a changing of instructors. When my clinical instructor and MGH West told me that she had been called for grand jury duty, I just knew that with my luck she would be chosen. Sure enough on Oct 10th she was picked for a 3 month term that mandated her to review cases in Cambridge, Lowell and Natick 3-4 days a week to determine, along with 22 others, if enough evidence existed to go to trial.

That was almost 2 weeks ago, and things have been gradually settling out at work. The plan is to transition me over to Aaron, a staff therapist who has been with MGH for over 5 years and has worked in both inpatient and outpatient settings. The problem with that right now is that Aaron has a full caseload and it will take a few weeks to transition some of his patients over to other therapists and/or to me, and to get my patients on his schedule. I've had to delegate a few of my favorite patients to Angela (my former CI) as she can see them once a week on Fridays when she is not at jury duty. This was done to free up my schedule to begin to take on new patients with Aaron. I've already moved to Aaron's schedule, which is MW 7-6:30, TFr 7-4:30 and Thursdays off. I've only had that schedule for a week, but it'll be interesting to see if I have the stamina for the longer days. Good thing I'm an endurance athlete, huh?

I guess the best part of this situation is that I get to work with a senior therapist who specializes in Spine in the interim. She has 30+ years experience and watching her work is amazing. She has different teaching approach that is more hands on that I am used to, but her intent is to give me words of wisdom for approaches, techniques and rationales that took her 5 or more years to develop and allow me to build from that.

We'll see how this all turns out.... 5 weeks down, 47 to go!

The Holy Rollers

Catholic girl and priest
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

Matt and I participated in a costume bowl-a-thon to benefit Cancer Support and Education groups. We needed a theme, so I came up with The Holy Rollers, a team that consisted of a priest, a nun, and 3 catholic school girls. We actually won for best costume and were awarded prizes.

My team consisted of Matt and three friends from school: Nicole, Tracie and Moriah. We had a blast, and helped raise money for a good cause!

Knee Deep into Week 3

I am almost through my 3rd week at my internship, which even now that I am seeing it typed doesn't seem possible. I guess it's because my first 2 weeks were spend mainly in orientation, and I don't know if that time has really prepared me for the internship like they had hoped. I'm someone who would have been better off spending the past 2 weeks getting used to my physical therapy clinic and not shared my thoughts on what the word culture means or what the MGH culture entails. A few things were definitely worth the time spend, especially observing a clinical specialist do a functionally based examination. Having someone with 25 years experience talk through her thought process while performing an exam was probably invaluable, although it definitely scared me to realize how far I was from her level.

I am also still trying to adjust to working full time. I have to admit that I don't like some of the life changes that have already occurred. I am struggling to find time to see Matt as we now appear to have opposite work schedules and I have spent more time in a car daily than on a bike. I guess with every big life change you have to reprioritize and figure out how to fit in all the important things.

I guess the good news is that I believe I have figured out how to get into work without buying a car. One of the PT aides lives down the street from me and has a very similar schedule. Between her and my roommate, I should be all set. Of course I have a couple of backups as well, because I wouldn't be me if I didn't always have a plan for most situations.

Geishas of 350 Allston

Geishas of 350 Allston
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

I was thankfully not that only girl that dressed up. Check out my fellow geishas... they definitely had the fancier fans, which were a blessing on such an abnormally hot September evening. Most of the guests ended up on the porch as the apartment was unbearable - especially in full costume!

A Ninja and his Geisha

A Ninja and his Geisha
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

Matt and Rob decided to have another theme party this past weekend. As usually, Matt and I went above the normal party-goer. I figure if you are going to dress up, you might as well make it worth the effort. The funny thing is that this really did not take me that much time. I feel some of the other girls spent more time picking out their non-ninja attire.

I have no idea what the theme will be for the next one, but I guarantee that Matt and I will go all out again!

Offically a Triathlete!

CCTri 2007 - bike
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

So, I completed my first triathlon a couple of weeks ago. There were 584 participants at the Cranberry Country Tri this year, and my results are below. Anna did not end up doing the race with me as planned because she had to get stitches in her big toe the night before after stepping on a piece of sharp metal.

My mom and I had to leave at 5:30am in order to make it down there in time to register and set up my stuff for the transitions. I ended up having some time to relax before the start of the race, which allowed me time to survey the entire scene and check out some of the course.

I was in the Athena group, which was women who weighted over 150 lbs. We were in the last heat, so it was easy to find my bike out of the water (not many left at that point). I got a little lost on the swim, and had to stop twice to make sure I was on course. My goggles fogged up and I could not see at all on the loop back as the sun was rising and I only saw white blurs.

I felt great on the bike where I started passing people and gaining speed. I thought the run was pretty slow, but apparently I was 346 out of 584 for that portion... I guess everyone else was slower! For the bike I was 423/584, and on the swim I was 528/584. That still allowed me to place 424 overall in just over 3 hours.

424 639 JESSICA RIGGS SOMERVILLE MA 3:03:40 9/16 ATHENA 528 34:34 3:53 423 1:22:54 2:34 346 59:46

All in all I am please with how my first tri went. I think I definitely need to improve my swim and transitions! Not sure when I'll be doing another one, but hopefully it'll be soon.

Day 1 & 2

I realize that I haven't posted since finding out my Waltham placement (still a sore subject) and it makes it seem like nothing has happened since early August. This is not the case. Since that time, I have completed an Olympic distance triathlon (my first ever!), changed roommates, had a lovely visit from my friend Sara and her boyfriend Kamyar, attended a wedding in Upstate NY with Matt, and got some very interesting news from my friend Dasha. Yes, her and Zsolt are finally expecting :)

I plan to write about all of these things. I am just a little exhausted from 2 full days of HR orientation, and plan to bike home soon. I decided to keep an evening shift at the computer lab to earn an extra $60/ week. Perhaps that will pay for the car it looks like I need to purchase. it's funny that I was so reluctant to sell my car 2 years ago when I decided to go back to school and now I can't imagine having to deal with owning one again. I plan to fight this and explore every other option... let's see how that turns out, huh?

Bad luck?

So, I got two letters on Friday: (1) a typed letter from MGH stating that I would be joining the WACC Outpatient team on Sept 4th and it gave me details concerning orientation and my salary, and (2) an email introduction letter giving me my clinical instructors name and hours. The main difference between these two letters was the outpatient clinic where I was to work. The first stated it was the WACC, or Wang Ambulatory Care Center, which is at the main hospital and where I really wanted to go. The 2nd said: "As you know, you have been selected to go to our Waltham clinic." Well, not only did I NOT know that, I had just received contradictory information. I called the coordinator of clinical education at MGH and she confirmed what I feared: that I was actually chosen to go to a site that is not accessible via public transportation, that has a smaller number of clinical specialists (1 vs 5+), and that doesn't have a large neuro population. The woman I talked to was sorry that I had received incorrect information and was surprised that I had been chosen for Waltham when I don't have a car.

This changes my plans for the year slightly, as I will not be able to get a dog, and will have to borrow Matt's car. We need to work out an arrangement where I will probably pay the bulk of his car insurance, gas and some maintenance to have the use of his car during the week. I guess I will be helping him out with financial concerns right now, which is good. And I just mapped the route and should be able to ride into work at least a few times a week. It's about 9 miles, and with my new road bike, it should take me less than 45 minutes. I just hope there is a shower there or some way for me to cool down before my shift. My hours are as follows...

MWF 7-3:30, TTh 10:30-7pm. The MWF shift is too early to take the commuter rail, which would be a 2 mile walk to work anyways, and I won't be able to bike in the winter. I guess I will figure it all out.

I thought I was going to be able to stay in Boston, continue commuting on my bike, and have a regular schedule. Apparently that was not in the cards for me... is ti bad luck? or perhaps a blessing in disguise? I guess I will have to wait to figure that out.

I get a raise...

So even though I have yet to start nor do I know the clinic where I'll be working, they have seen it fit to raise the hourly wages of the interns by an extra $0.90/hr. This means I'll have an extra $36/ week... perhaps enough to pay for a puppy! I'm already looking at dogs online, although I need to know exactly where I'm working (downtown or Waltham), my hours and my roommate's availability. Within the next year, however, I would love to have my own dog :)

Bride and Groom at Sunset

Bride and Groom at Sunset
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

Heather and Alex had everyone meet them at the Vermont Brewfest to enjoy some microbrews and to take pictures with the newly weds. We took a bunch of group photos at the large Adirondak chair, but Stephanie also snapped off a couple shots of them alone at sunset. They are so perfect together, and I wish them the best!

Under the Umbrella

Under the Umbrella
Originally uploaded by jessriggs.

This is a picture of Michelle and I at Heather and Alex's wedding a couple of weeks ago. After months of planning and getting everything in order, the weather decided to not fit into the plan of a lovely outdoor wedding. The bride in groom took it in stride, however, and still walked down the "aisle" to the tree house where they exchanged their vows while we hundled under umbrellas down below.

I'll admit that I did not actually hear much of what was said between the two of them, except I did hear Heather replace "I promise to stand by you through the trouble we may have" with "we WILL have." A nice touch that got a laugh out of those in attendance. The wedding was followed by a pig roast and dancing at the St. John's Club.

It was a great weekend, as I was able to go for a long bike ride with my friend Josh on Saturday AM and then head to the Vermont Brewer's Fest with the wedding party in the evening. I realize being up there again how much I really love the people and the atmosphere in general. Perhaps I'll end up in VT by the end of 2008... who knows?

First Brick Workout

I did my first brick workout today. It wasn't planned but I was feeling great and felt like pushing myself, so after my 30 mile bike ride with Katie, I ran 3.5 miles. I was tired, but I felt like my legs were underneath me and I could continue to push through the fatigue. Of course, I did not swim beforehand and didn't run the 6+ miles I am going to need to pull off on August 26th, but I think this is a good place to be 5-6 weeks out. I am planning on biking 40-50 miles this weekend up in Burlington, VT with a good friend and avid rider. The couple I lived with for 10 weeks is getting married on Friday afternoon at a public park right on Lake Champlain, and I figured I might as well bring my bike and log some good scenic miles on Saturday!

I think I am even starting to think like a triathlete now, scary!

It's A Small World After All

So, last night was Matt's DJ night at Rivergods. A new wave/ post punk night at a very chill venue in Cambridge conveniently located a few blocks from his apartment. He spun from 8-9, 10-11, and 12-12:30. I made it till just after midnight when I had to head out. A good group of my friends came out to enjoy some drinks along with the tunes and I think it was a pretty successful night.

Matt also had a good group of friends come out for it, most importantly his friend Rachel who has just moved from Albany to Boston (a transition he knows well). She arrived with the guy she is currently dating who, as chance may have it, is my ex's good friend from high school. Not Brian, but my ex from 4 years ago Mike. I tried to fight of the ghosts of ex past, but this guy kept offering up unsolicited information about Mike's business, his new girlfriend, and how they've moved in together. I tried to redirect conversation and insert some tidbits about how I am also doing well: dating a wonderful guy, about to finish graduate school, working at an amazing hospital, training for a triathlon, etc. He then started to pump me for information about Matt and I in order to report back to Mike. Yuck.

I am really glad that Mike is doing well, and has finally moved out of his parents' house. I know that I have moved on and have finally reached a place in my life where I feel truly happy, but the conversation last night through me back into a time when I was being rejected and struggling to find self-worth. Luckily I phoned Sara before walking home and going to bed, because I woke up fully refreshed and feeling quite confident that breaking things off with Mike and the rest of the decisions I've made in the last 4 years have led me down an amazing path. One that I am still excited to see where it goes!